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The first step in resolving a hurtful situation often begins with an apology or a gesture, like a hug, which serves as a form of apology.
As we embark on the journey of inner healing and connecting the different parts of our story with our purpose, I believe it's important for us to apologize to ourselves – and perhaps even offer ourselves a comforting hug, if we feel the need to do so. Go ahead…hug yourself.
Regardless of what you may have been told, after God, we know ourselves better than anyone else knows us. People who struggle with a sense of identity often feel like they don’t know who they are, but I think we only feed into this belief if we’ve had to hide, conceal, and mask who we truly are. Usually, at some point in our lives, we become ashamed or fearful to say, “This is who I am.” Eventually, we look in the mirror and we feel so disconnected from ourselves.
For me personally, I spent most of my life feeling too ashamed to say I am broken. I used to struggle with perfectionism and people-pleasing for years. I mirrored everyone around hoping to make others happy so that I could feel accepted, but I was abandoning the truest parts of myself. Maybe you can relate. In turn, I found myself as an adult wondering who the heck am I?!
Sometimes we can make choices that can hurt ourselves or others because we’re so disconnected from understanding what we need. I’ve had a lot of moments like this. Maybe we get into an argument with someone, and we spit out those hurtful words, or maybe the argument is within our heads and we’re saying hurtful words to ourselves instead of speaking kindly and showing ourselves grace.
Once you reconnect with certain parts of yourself, you tap into this power that says I get to be as graceful and kind as I want to be to myself. When you realize that you don’t have to be overly critical or speak negatively to yourself, you’ll begin to connect with parts of yourself that have been buried by pain, shame, depression, anxiety, and the list goes on.
With that said, regardless of when you read this let's begin to focus on forgiving ourselves, being kind to ourselves, and extending grace to the most “broken” parts of us. The reconnection of any severed relationship begins with an apology. And the great thing about inner healing is that you can forgive yourself as MANY times as you need without ever thinking twice so that you can begin to repair the relationship with yourself.
Take some time this week to meditate on Psalm 103:2-4: Praise the Lord, my soul, and forget not all his benefits— 3 who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases, 4 who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion.
